Plans for the nation’s largest ‘body farm’ have been put on hold after area residents complained about the possibility of having their brains eaten by the walking dead, and the nearby airport expressed concern that zombies may walk onto the runways.

Texas State University had planned to build the nation’s third cadaver body farm on a 17-acre site just off of Texas Highway 21, near the San Marcos Municipal Airport.

Researchers use these body farms to help the police solve crime scene problems by burying human cadavers and studying their decomposition.

Al Gore, who benefited from the Zombie vote in the 2000 election, issued a statement suggesting that body farms should be moved to much colder climates because of his concern that global warming will cause the corpses to decay too quickly. “Tipper and I have always supported the walking dead and feel it’s our duty to do everything we can to help them. I believe Canada would be the best place for them.”

Security measures for the site include a razor-wire fence and zombie-proof cages, but residents still feel unsafe. One concerned local said, “You’ve seen what these zombies can do in the movies. Have you seen 28 Days Later? Just thinking that they were actually planning on putting a bunch of those brain-eating bastards down the street from my house gives me the creeps.”

“While the increased risk might be very small, it cannot be completely eliminated, and we cannot go forward with the Highway 21 site,” Texas State provost Perry Moore said.

The university is scouting for a new location.

Source: Houston Chronicle

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